Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
