Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
kristin has been a bad kristin
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
