At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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