I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize