I love black thongs
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
