Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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