Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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