haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
