he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
