i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
