You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
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