i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
