I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
