he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
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