Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
