So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
