what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
She announced her abortion via fbk
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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