y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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