In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize