when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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