i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
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