Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize