dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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