OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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