i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize