as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
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