I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
