What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I could make wine with my vomit
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
