Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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