In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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