She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
