We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I just forgot I was standing up.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
