hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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