If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
You ate ashes out of my bong
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
