I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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