Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
