There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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