Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
that may or may not have been my penis.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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