i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
