why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
