I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Randomize
