We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
