I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
