Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize