sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
