Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
