i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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