If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I came so hard my ears popped.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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