if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
