i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
