i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
